Break Time

While I am on break this week, and
laying on my couch, I will be pretending I am this girl.

It is Thanksgiving week! I have never been so thankful for a school break. Today was a short week for me, only two days! I am lucky enough that I don't go back to work until Monday. Three whole days off sounds like heaven.

I am tired. Juggling three jobs during the week means a lot of scheduling, phone calls, and planning. On top of work, looking for a teaching job, trying to figure out the when and where of moving out, and a long commute, Branden and I are dealing with a lot of family stuff right now.

Putting it simply, this year has been hard. Most days are a struggle for one reason or another, most of which I can't even explain to myself. Unfortunately, my grandma, and both of Branden's grandpas are not doing well either. We are gone every other weekend making trips to Lamesa and Oklahoma, and Branden plans on spending a lot of time in East Texas this week before we both go out there next weekend.

Physically and emotionally, it is all very draining. I have become so close to my grandma over the last couple years, and seeing her health deteriorate is very hard. Seeing Branden's grandpas not doing well is hard as well. Leaving late on Friday nights to spend the weekend with our family is so worth it, but it is exhausting.

This week I think I've experienced a little bit of how Branden must feel 90% of the time in our relationship, at least since April. Seeing him hurting and worrying over his family is worse than me feeling the way I do most days. This makes me love Branden even more, knowing a little bit of how he feels when he sees me hurting.

Things are not easy. I never thought I would have to work so hard to be happy. But I want to be happy, and knowing it isn't easy makes those moments of pure happiness even more meaningful.

I am so thankful we have a break this week. I am looking forward to spending some time by myself, some time with Branden, his family, and my family, and some time simply resting. I believe I will return to work refreshed and ready for a few more weeks until the next break. It doesn't hurt that by the time I go back to work, it will officially be Christmas season!

Have a happy Thanksgiving!