Little Treasures

I am on a little bit of a cleaning spree today. My room isn't used very often, so it becomes kind of a dropping place for all of my stuff.

I was looking under the bed to see if there was anything I could get rid of and came across a few picture albums I hadn't looked at in years. Pictures of me in high school with friends I've lost touch with, pictures of three of my favorite years when I was on drill team, and pictures of my family.

I came across this one and couldn't help but smile.

Two people in this picture aren't here anymore, and another is in the hospital trying to get healthy again. I remember this trip to Lamesa with my mom and an old friend, Jenna. It was only 7 or 8 years ago, but it feels like another life time. While moving forward is all I can do, I can't help but wish I could visit these old pictures and see these smiles again.

It is going to take me even longer to get my room cleaned up if I keep coming across treasures like this.

Thankfulness

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Happy Thanksgiving!

It is our first real holiday without Mom. Thanksgiving was never a very big deal in our house. One year, in a effort to avoid all of the cooking and clean up, we had lasagna...that we made the night before. Even though this holiday isn't my favorite, and it honestly isn't very meaningful to me, it will still be so hard to sit at a table and know that for my family, someone is missing. 

I am glad that we will be spending the day with Branden's family and that they invited not just me, but my Dad and brother as well. While it won't be the easiest day for us, I know it will be filled with good food, laughter, and plenty to be thankful for.

Speaking of thankfulness, I didn't fully participate in the "30 Days of Thankfulness" trend on Facebook, so I decided to list some things I am thankful for, here on the blog.

I am thankful for...

1. My wonderful boyfriend, Branden. He has been so good to me for the past five years, and even more so in the last several months. Our relationship has never been through so much, and every day I am thankful for how patient, understanding, and supportive he is. 

2. My Dad. Through everything, he is always there to make me laugh and ask how my day was. I have spent more time with him in the last months, than I've been able to in a very long time, and every time we get to hang out we are always laughing. I am so grateful to have him.

3. My best friend, Erika. You can go back here and read about why I love this girl so much, and why I am so thankful for her. She is one of the best people I know, and I am so glad that I have her in my life. I honestly feel like I would be very lost, and a lot less happy, if she wasn't around.

4. My family and Branden's family. I am so lucky to be surrounded by wonderful people in my life.

6. Our oldest dog, Sadie. She helped my Mom through a very difficult time in her life, and for that I will always love her in a special way.

7. Our little pup, Jack. He always knows when I need to see his cute face way too close to mine.

8. Our crazy dog, Lady Bug. She has brought so much joy to our family. If nothing else makes me laugh or smile all day, I know she will. 

9. My degree and certification. I have wonderful parents who saved and put me through college, and while I don't have the job I worked so hard for quite yet, I know I will one of these days and I am grateful I have the education that will land me that job.

10. All of the blogs I read. It seems like a silly thing to be so thankful for, but I love keeping up with my favorite blogs and getting inspired by them. Blog reading is one of my favorite things to do in my spare time. 

11. The fact that the jobs I have right now allow me to see Branden a little more during the day when we get lunch together. 

12. Books, books, books. I am reading something about 90% of the day, whether is is blogs, books, stories online, etc. I am in love with reading, and so thankful that I am fortunate enough to know how. My heart hurts for people who cannot read, and do not get to enjoy the magic of written words (cheesy much?). 

13. My camera. I have a new love for photography and learning about my camera. I don't get to use it as much as I want, but when I do, boy, am I happy.

14. My house. Most days I am ready to move out and have my own place, but this will always be home. I have never lived anywhere else, I've never even switched bedrooms. Being home, surrounded by memories of mom and all of the joy we have here is irreplaceable.

15. The fact that I don't have to work weekends. Working weekends all of last year definitely made it hard to have time with my family and Branden. I am so glad that I get to spend my weekends at home now!

16. My brother, Clay. I am proud of him for putting in the effort to make changes in his life to get where he needs to be. 

17. Movies. If anyone knows me, they know I love the movies. On Mondays at work, people ask me what movies I saw over the weekend. Movies are almost as good as books.

18. My friends. I don't have a ton of them, but the ones I have, I love so much. I am thankful to a have a few close friends, ones that I enjoy talking to and being around, rather than a ton of friends I don't know very well. 

19. The small things. I've learned that I need the small things to keep me going. Things like my favorite leopard print flats, my one friend blanket, reruns of my favorite shows, etc. 

20. I am SO thankful for the amazing people that donated to our team for Light the Night. We raised over $3,000 dollars! I went in thinking that $1,000 was a huge goal, and we tripled it. I am so thankful for those who walked, got people to donate, and those who donated to us. I am still amazed by the generosity of people.

21. Most of all, I am thankful for the mother that I had. I miss her more than I can explain to anyone, and every day there is something I want to tell her. She taught me to be thankful, and showed me the importance of taking time to appreciate what I have, even the small things. 

Have a wonderful Thanksgiving.

Break Time

While I am on break this week, and
laying on my couch, I will be pretending I am this girl.

It is Thanksgiving week! I have never been so thankful for a school break. Today was a short week for me, only two days! I am lucky enough that I don't go back to work until Monday. Three whole days off sounds like heaven.

I am tired. Juggling three jobs during the week means a lot of scheduling, phone calls, and planning. On top of work, looking for a teaching job, trying to figure out the when and where of moving out, and a long commute, Branden and I are dealing with a lot of family stuff right now.

Putting it simply, this year has been hard. Most days are a struggle for one reason or another, most of which I can't even explain to myself. Unfortunately, my grandma, and both of Branden's grandpas are not doing well either. We are gone every other weekend making trips to Lamesa and Oklahoma, and Branden plans on spending a lot of time in East Texas this week before we both go out there next weekend.

Physically and emotionally, it is all very draining. I have become so close to my grandma over the last couple years, and seeing her health deteriorate is very hard. Seeing Branden's grandpas not doing well is hard as well. Leaving late on Friday nights to spend the weekend with our family is so worth it, but it is exhausting.

This week I think I've experienced a little bit of how Branden must feel 90% of the time in our relationship, at least since April. Seeing him hurting and worrying over his family is worse than me feeling the way I do most days. This makes me love Branden even more, knowing a little bit of how he feels when he sees me hurting.

Things are not easy. I never thought I would have to work so hard to be happy. But I want to be happy, and knowing it isn't easy makes those moments of pure happiness even more meaningful.

I am so thankful we have a break this week. I am looking forward to spending some time by myself, some time with Branden, his family, and my family, and some time simply resting. I believe I will return to work refreshed and ready for a few more weeks until the next break. It doesn't hurt that by the time I go back to work, it will officially be Christmas season!

Have a happy Thanksgiving!

Quilts

My new obsession? Quilts.

Even though I have only made one quilt before, and it has been years since then, I am dying to make one.

My Dad's mother, my Mimi, taught me to sew. I own her sewing machine now. It is old and yellowing, but it works better than my mom's younger machine. I love knowing that when I sew, I am using the same machine that she sewed on for as long as I can remember. The same machine she taught me how to sew on.

Sewing is one of my favorite things to do, although I don't get to very often. I can't design clothes, and I need a relatively simple pattern, but I enjoy it regardless.

Here are some quilts I found on Pinterest that are seriously inspiring me to get out my machine and get started.

zig-zag

diamond

arrow

I would love to pick a pattern and beautiful fabric and make a quilt for my and Branden's future apartment. I think it would make a lovely symbol of our first home together, and something we could always treasure. 

Have you ever sewn a quilt before? 

Fresh

Branden surprised me with tickets to ICE this weekend! I have never been so cold! 

I can't wait to share the pictures.

I've gotten a little behind on my blogging, obviously. I don't have much time during the week as I seemed to have a few weeks ago. I'm not home until 7, and lately I've only had enough energy to make dinner and sit on the couch before heading to bed.

I am hoping that I can get back into the swing of things this week. I have been thinking a lot about so many different things in my life. My favorite blogs are ones that are personal, where I feel like I get to see beyond projects, fashion, cooking, etc and into their lives.

I'd like my blog to be like that. I am drafting some new posts, looking through Pinterest, editing pictures, and really trying to make time for things I love to do.

Here is to a fresh week. I hope it's a good one.

Five Good Things: 10/30, 10/31, 11/01, 11/02

Taken at the Light the Night walk in Dallas on Sunday

Tuesday, October 30th

-staying in bed until the very last minute

-5 dollar movies

-hearing the wind chime we were given in honor of mom

-golden sky on the way home

-time with Dad and Branden 

Wednesday, October 31st

-new books in the mail

-dogs in costumes

-handing out candy with Dad

-cooking dinner

-cute trick or treaters

Thursday, November 1st

-having lunch with Branden

-buying Christmas stuff

-making Christmas sweaters with Erika

-talking in weird accents

-new episodes of favorite tv shows

Friday, November 2nd

-spending the morning with dad

-picking up my new glasses

-substituting

-dinner with Branden's family

-sleeping on the couch with Bug

Always Remember

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I need to remember this every day.